Things I Could Buy For The Price of One Miller Lite at Yankee Stadium

April 7, 2008 – 7:46 am
  • Two Happy Meals from McDonalds
  • The Ingredients for a Twelve-Egg Omelet
  • A Blowjob from a Whore in Montreal (tip not included)
  • A Full Pitcher of Beer at Cheapshots
  • Five Rides on the New York City Subway (that are more enjoyable than standing in line at the concession stands waiting for a beer)
  • Two 16-ounce beers at Angels Stadium (tip included)
  • A Six-Pack of Heineken from a Bodega in Any Neighborhood in New York City
  • Four six-inch subs from Subway (with coupon included in yesterday’s stadium giveaway, the 2008 New York Yankees Calendar presented by Subway)
  • Two rides on one of the fastest roller coasters in the world
  • A 5-euro note
  • A Twelve-Pack of Miller Lite from a Bodega in Any Neighborhood in New York City
  • Two blowjobs from a Whore in Bangkok (tip included, medical treatment not included)
  • 2 Tickets in Section 402 to the Friday, May 23rd New York Mets - Colorado Rockies Game (ticket processing fees included)

(The cost of a 16-ounce draft Miller Lite at Yankee Stadium this year is $9.50. I estimate that 32% of that goes directly into Alex Rodriguez’s pocket. The remaining 68% should be shoved up Steinbrenner’s ass.)



  1. 19 Responses

  2. you’re going to be one of those dads arent you, that brings his own popcorn to the movie theaters

    By NYC Pond Chick on Apr 7, 2008

  3. You can get a 20 oz. Miller Lite at the Carl’s Cheesesteak stand for $8.75, cheesesteak optional, although how could you possibly say no after staring at them for five minutes… oh, wait, I see what they’re doing.

    By Ben on Apr 7, 2008

  4. we need to go to montreal together.

    By lozo on Apr 7, 2008

  5. with the rise of the looney over the $, those canadian hummers are getting to be more expensive.

    pretty soon, canadians will start pouring across our border for cheep booze and hookers.

    By keith on Apr 7, 2008

  6. it was funny until the bangkok line. while possibly true, it just made the whole piece mean and not worth linking to.

    By metsgrrl on Apr 7, 2008

  7. A-Rod is so gangsta it’s not even funny.

    By Chris on Apr 7, 2008

  8. Last year at Fenway a guy offered me $50 for the last two beers I ordered before they stopped serving. I was too drunk to say yes. Budweiser never tasted so good.

    By nancypearlwannabe on Apr 7, 2008

  9. You know, Chris, no one at Yankee Stadium is forcing you to buy beer. They may force you to stand up during God Bless America, but the beer purchase, that’s your choice.

    By Ben K. on Apr 7, 2008

  10. Just don’t get drunk (and high) before a game in an effort to save money. You’ll end up shirtless in the women’s bathroom.

    True story.

    By Todd on Apr 7, 2008

  11. Ben K.: Yes, you’re right. And that’s why I didn’t have a beer there. But eating a hot dog without a beer at a baseball game goes against everything I stand for!

    By Chris on Apr 7, 2008

  12. what were you doing at yankees stadium? Sidenote: STFU.

    By Meaghan on Apr 7, 2008

  13. That’s why you have to load up a either Billy’s or Stan’s across the street…

    By JJ on Apr 7, 2008

  14. What’s Billy’s at these days? I seem to remember $5/ 12 oz bud about 10 years ago.

    Really should be loading up in the parking lot.

    By Cock D on Apr 8, 2008

  15. freaking love this. was thinking along these lines on saturday at the game. my friend and i decided to stay at least an hour in throwing $6 beers back at stan’s to avoid the $10 dollar tab for A beer.

    By mona on Apr 8, 2008

  16. $4.00 = one lychee martini at Verlaine’s for happy hour (oh yes, I’ve seen as many guys drink this as girls, you know who you are)

    to wash it down:

    $5 = One Cubano, across the street from Verlaine’s. El Castillo de Jagua. hands down one of the best cubanos in the city

    extra credit:

    $.41 = one stamp at the post office

    Total = $9.41
    balance of 9 cents = inflation

    By Chicopea on Apr 8, 2008

  17. Erm, hello, why would you want to drink miller anyway, for gawd’s sake?

    By Timguvnor on Apr 9, 2008

  18. Timguvnor - if the other choice is Jacob Best, I would want to drink Miller.

    By Cock D on Apr 10, 2008

  19. $9.50 For a Beer @ Yankee Stadium?

    Payment of The A-Rod Blue Lip Gloss Tax

    By Michael Leggett on Apr 10, 2008

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