Working in the Land of Bad Salespeople
March 27, 2008 – 11:13 am
If you’re a salesperson, and you’re cold-calling me, and you only leave your name and phone number in my voicemail, without any mention of where you’re from, who you’re representing, and what opportunity you’re pitching to me, why would I have any reason to call you back?
For example, I’ve gotten the following message about five times in the past two weeks:
“Hey, Chris! This is Maurice. Call me back! 973-XXX-XXXX.”
Oh! Of course! Maurice! That good friend of mine named Maurice!
Oh. Wait. I don’t know Maurice at all. I’ve never spoken with Maurice. He’s just some sales guy from Jersey. Yet he leaves me a message every time as though he’s my best friend.
Eventually, he’ll give up. Maybe then, I’ll wait a few weeks and call him back to leave this message:
“Hey, Maurice! This is your old pal Chris. I’m worried… I haven’t heard from you in a while, and was just wondering how you were doing. Call me back! 212-XXX-XXXX.”
If you don’t have any pitch for what you’re selling to leave me in a voice message, you probably don’t have a very good product to sell. Either that, or you’re a very bad salesman. Even more likely, both are true.
7 Responses
Whenever I get a message like that I try to put the pieces together from the previous night…then my best drinking buddy and I sit around over beers and try to figure out who Maurice (or John, or Brad, or Kevin) is.
By brooke on Mar 27, 2008
this happened to me yesterday, though the salesman used the “you’re in deep shit” version of the voicemail. nothing brightens a day like being led to believe that something terrible has happened. at 5pm, “it’s very important that you return my call” sounded a lot like “a loved-one’s been kidnapped and only a phone call to a guy named raymondo in hackensack will set them free!”
By jen on Mar 27, 2008
those kinds of calls (the you’re in deep shit tone) are usually bill collectors/old debt collectors. believe me i know…i get about 2 a day
By jarrett on Mar 27, 2008
Yeah, that’s when you call them back and say, “I have been getting so many fucking calls from you guys and I don’t even know a Jarrett.” The debt won’t go away, but the asshole collector’s will.
By brooke on Mar 27, 2008
wow…and props to myself on hitting Chris’ biggest pet peeve in that last comment.
By brooke on Mar 27, 2008
They must be salespeople for my radio station.
Lazy, unmotivated, and downright retarded.
By beej on Mar 27, 2008
Dude - post their damn numbers. We’ll call ‘em back for you… if you know what I mean.
(if you don’t, I’ll explain: I like to fax reams of blank paper to phone numbers left without any message - they love the beeping sound)
By Cock D on Mar 28, 2008