New York Businesses on My Shit List Today
January 3, 2008 – 4:11 pmI’ve done this before, but I need to do it again, because I was pretty much enraged after shopping - or trying to - last night.
1. Trader Joe’s
The love affair is over. I hate you, I hate you, I hate you. I’m tired of waiting in line for 45 minutes. I’m tired of trying to navigate through aisles not even wide enough for two people. And I’m tired of the entire island of Manhattan ravaging the shelves to the point that they are empty. Look, Trader Joe’s: you’re my local grocery store. You’re three blocks away from my apartment. And I’m sick and tired of people from the Upper West Side riding 40 minutes on the subway to run (walk very, very slowly) rampant through your store like they’re on Supermarket Sweep (in slow motion).
Last night, I walked in, and four of the first five items on my shopping list weren’t on the shelves. You know what one of those items was? WHITE BREAD! In fact, you didn’t have any bread in the bread aisle. Except Raisin Bread. And that just goes great with turkey. Oh, wait. You didn’t have any turkey, either!
2. Whole Foods
I can’t believe I stooped so low that I went to your store. But after the Trader Joe’s nightmare, I didn’t have much of a choice. After all, where else in the city am I going to find broccoli rabe? Certainly not at Associated. $6.50 for some grated cheese? $2.99 for a bag of frozen lima beans? $3.99 for a loaf of white bread? No wonder they call you guys Whole Paycheck.
3. CVS
I’m very loyal to CVS for one reason alone: it’s not Duane Reade. But at 11pm, there was a line six deep at the pharmacy drop-off counter, and their shelves for contact solution were completely empty. Maybe they were in the midst of two shifts and just needed to restock the shelves, but CVS is now on my shit list, because they forced me to go to Duane Reade.
4. Duane Reade
A new, shiny Duane Reade opened on 14th Street last week. When I walked in last night, THE EMPLOYEES GREETED ME! And not even in a snide forced manner! And they even asked me if I was able to find everything I was looking for! And they sounded like they actually meant it!
This all sounds wonderful, but I’ll give them another two weeks before they’re just as disgruntled as the employees at all of the other Duane Reades.
Also, they jacked up the price of my lotion by $1.50. And I was 3 points away from a $5 reward last week, but the points “expired” on December 31st. So fuck ‘em.
30 Responses
The only time Trader Joe’s is shoppable is like nine am on a Saturday. It’s like heaven…the shelves are fully stocked, they have fresh veggies, and there’s no one smashing you into walls with their carts. Tough time to get there though. I can rarely make it happen.
By Alecia on Jan 3, 2008
Yeah, I’m afraid the only good time to go to TJ’s is at a time when no one else can go…i.e., in the middle of the work day, NOT during a lunch hour. Otherwise, its madness. I don’t enjoy walking into the store to see the end of the line right in front of me.
I’m loyal to CVS because a) its what I use at home in Boston, b) its where my prescriptions get sent to (which I could change, but I don’t), and c) it just doesn’t feel as dirty and grimy as Duane Reade does. I swear, I feel like I need to shower after I go into one of them.
By Casey on Jan 3, 2008
definitely update us in a few weeks on the staff friendliness at the new D.R….
By DH on Jan 4, 2008
I went to that Duane Reade, and the employees were SO NICE! And shiny is definitely the word- the floors were sparkling!
By brookLyn gaL on Jan 4, 2008
i walked by trader joe’s in the cold yesterday and people were lining up outside just to get in. in minus-a-million degree weather. i thought, what in hell could be so fantastic in there? apparently, nothing.
By vanishingNY on Jan 4, 2008
you obviousley have no clue about shopping. period. if you have frequented tj’s in the past, you should know by now that you cannot go there after 5pm. the shelves are always bare. and quit yer freaking complaining. there is a strategy for that store. hit the aisles first, avoiding things along the perimeter. then, while waiting in line, finish the rest. as for whole foods, if you can’t afford it, don’t gripe about it. they have the freshest selection of produce in the city, barring green markets. their meats are stellar. i’d rather pay a bit more and get all my shopping done in one store, than have to run around and bargain hunt.
btw, even if the tj’s line wraps around the store, it never takes 45 minutes.
By anthony on Jan 4, 2008
anthony: OH! GREAT! I’ll go to TJ’s before 5pm! Because although I work a 9-to-6 job, I can totally get there before 5pm - especially since TJ’s opens at 9am! And you’re right, because I work a full-time job, I obviously have no clue about shopping. Period.
By Chris on Jan 4, 2008
Don’t let anyone fool you - UWS to east 14th street takes a solid hour unless the subway connection gods are very very good to you.
By kristin on Jan 4, 2008
Sick… I LOVE TJ’s… but only cuz i get my frozen food lunches there (which probably means… eating all this frozen food will make me fat and i’ll die soon… but whatever, it’s cheap!). if it weren’t for the fact that i don’t want to go out and buy lunch for $10 everyday, i wouldn’t even be going to TJ’s…
Maybe I’ll drag myself up at 9am sometime….
By Joanna on Jan 4, 2008
Even when Trader Joe’s has something I want—which is rare—the fact that the checkout people inevitably comment on my purchases is enough reason for me to hate that place with every fiber of my being. I don’t want to discuss my ginger snaps, asswipe. I just want to pay and go.
By Judy on Jan 4, 2008
Be forewarned: NEVER enter Trader Joe’s after 3:00pm on weekdays or 11:00am on weekends.
By Lisa Shaw on Jan 4, 2008
There’s a TJ’s in my neighborhood and it’s never that crowded, even on weekends. Face it, manhattan’s over.
By Liam McEneaney on Jan 4, 2008
As Yogi Berra sort of said - Nobody goes there anymore because it’s so crowded.
Trader Joe’s in the ‘burbs is great. Park your car, get in, everything you need is always available, get out quickly. Cashier only asks if you found everything you needed.
The problem with Manhattan is that you have 50 times the population density, with the choice ranging from some horrible Key Food to Whole Paycheck. So TJ’s is crowded.
TJ’s could open up 100 stores in Manhattan and become the Starbucks of grocery stores. Too bad there are few 10,000-square-foot spaces avaible.
By Richard on Jan 5, 2008
There is another strategy, which I am almost hesitant to share….In fact nevermind
By Maria on Jan 5, 2008
Anthony
Whole Foods isn’t a little more expensive, it is stupid expensive. They will try and gouge you for as much as they can get away with. When they first opened on Union Square they tried charging $11.00 for a roasted chicken. Two weeks later when no one bought them the price came down to $8.00, which is still about $2.00 more than in other stores. Also you can do a good 25 minutes waiting in line to check out there also, if it is the wrong time of day.
By Patrick on Jan 5, 2008
patrick…its called capitalism and it works pretty well. just ask the russians about the alternative…
By jim on Jan 5, 2008
Move to Californa… We have TJ’s everywhere and there is always a good selection if you get there before noon…
plus the weather is way better here.
Whole Foods is Capitalism at its best…They don’t even have mental health care for their employees…who are all smoking weed in their cars during their breaks….Go figure that one.
By Shaniqua on Jan 6, 2008
Jim: Waiting in long lines to buy food is capitalism? I think the Russians know a lot about that.
By Chris on Jan 6, 2008
Really, if you want some price gouging, check out your local Gristedes, nevermind Whole Foods! Large 17oz container of SABA hummus, $7.69!!!!!!!
By nospam@hotmail.com on Jan 6, 2008
The reason it’s so crowded is because it’s the only one in Manhattan. It’s the only one in Manhattan because they got a great deal on the space thru NYU. That way they can keep their prices low. The employees are out on the floor all the time restocking the shelves. If you can’t find it on the shelves, ask. They’ll go back and try to find it for you. If you can’t stand the crowds go to Food Emporium up the block. They’re overpriced, have crappy produce and don’t give a shit. But the aisles aren’t crowded.
By bestdays on Jan 6, 2008
It is so funny reading these posts.. I just returned home from T.J.’s. and I have to agree with Shaniqua. I went to my ’secret’ trader joe’s in South San Francisco because my usual one in Daly City has allegedly been without power since the big bad storm on Friday. It was a Zoo but we were out of there in 20 minutes. I guess there are advantages to living in CA.
By Rebecca on Jan 6, 2008
When I lived in Sausalito I shopped at the San Rafael TJ. It was always packed - parking lot a constant jam, crowded aisles, long lines. It didn’t stop me because I love TJ. But I always had to tell myself as I was driving there “You know it’s going to be jammed so just chill out and accept it.”
Not so different, Rebecca and Shaniqua.
By fountains on Jan 6, 2008
Oh, and it was the same at the SF TJ’s on 9th. Always packed (store and parking lot).
By fountains on Jan 6, 2008
Wow - you New Yorkers are sad - I live in Los Angeles, in the Toluca Lake neighborhood, and I have THREE Trader Joe’s within a 5 mile radiance of my house. I saw Debby Reynolds at the Riverside Drive location about 3 months ago!
By Greg on Jan 7, 2008
At least we New Yorkers haven’t had our brains fried by the sun.
Light RADIATES from the sun. The sun has RADIANCE.
The distance from a center of a circle to the perimeter is the RADIUS!!
By Hugo on Jan 7, 2008
Let’s have a pity party for the guy who lives 3 blocks from three of the largest grocery stores in NYC. We’re not just UWS-ers coming to Joe’s, we’re Brooklynites, too. I have all you White Bread here in my kitchen and I’m holding it hostage until you take out your vibrating butt plug.
By tony on Jan 7, 2008
Why the fuck are LA folks reading a blog about New York? You know why? Because LA SUCKS BALLS!!!! Go fuck yourselves while you drive to your 3 TJ’s all around you within a 5 mile radius!!! And fuck Debbi Reynolds.
By Teresa on Jan 7, 2008
notice how she didn’t tell us NoCals to suck balls, a grudging respect from NY to SF ????
By Rebecca on Jan 8, 2008
Look, nobody talks shit about my town. I’m a native New Yorker and I ain’t gonna have some superficial LA-asshole who can’t spell talk that kind of shit. Man - fuck that! And name dropping is lame.
By Teresa on Jan 8, 2008
Teresa, you sound like such a sweet girl.
By fountains on Jan 8, 2008