OMG, I Love Your Blog!
So, I’m about to sound like a total jackass here. And my apologies to those readers of mine who take this seriously. There’s a topic that I need to talk about. Another blogger finally broke the silence on this topic a couple weeks ago in a much more straightforward manner. I’m not straightforward. I would rather make backhanded remarks in the form of mockery. So, here - in rough form - is an e-mail that lands in my inbox roughly five times a week:
Oh my God! Is this you? Is this really you, the East Village Idiot? I just found your blog and I think it’s totally awesome. I can really relate to a lot of the stuff you write about. You’re such a good writer! Additional insincere praise here. Sorry, I cannot pull my lips away from your ass.
So, I have a question. I was thinking… I have a blog, and you have a blog. So, can we, like, ”trade links?” You know… I’ll link to your blog on my blog and you link me back! You should check out my blog! I’ve got a picture of my 6-month-old baby girl drooling in my header, a photo album from my last vacation to Branson, Missouri, and a story about how my cat loves to play with the ball of twine in my backyard in suburban Omaha, Nebraska!
But I’m not going to link to you unless you link to me. And you should totally link to me! I’m sure all of your readers would love to waste time clicking on the link in your blogroll to my blog, spending time reading my meaningless drivel, leaving completely unenetertained, and demanding 2 minutes of their life back.
After this, I’m going to e-mail that Jason Mulgrew guy who writes a funny blog I read once and tell him that he should link to me, too. Maybe I’ll e-mail Gawker, too. But I’m not linking them unless they link me back! They’d be total jerks not to link to me. So would you.
Okay, well, thanks in advance! Catch you on the Internets!
The blogroll is a service to you, the reader, offering blogs that I enjoy reading and hope that you will enjoy reading, too. Please, take advantage of it. Cherish these links - I’m rarely pleased with the crap I find in the World Wide Webiverse.
This entry was posted on Friday, July 13th, 2007 at 12:16 pm and is filed under Blogging about Blogging. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
July 13th, 2007 at 12:41 pm
says:you don’t link me and i am the funniest girl alive so obviously the blogroll shows nothing. i will still read you daily though.
July 13th, 2007 at 12:50 pm
says:ratbloodonher-
1) Perhaps changing your moniker might make linking to you a little more appealing. I have a thing against rodents.
2) You want him to link you, get him drunk. It’s what I did.
July 13th, 2007 at 12:57 pm
says:I hate bloggers.
July 13th, 2007 at 1:26 pm
says:people asking for links are the telemarketers of the 21st century. just replace cold-calling with cold-emailing. fucking bloggers.
July 13th, 2007 at 1:27 pm
says:oh, i hit submit comment too soon. the thing i wanted to say was in that post you link to, it’s a girl from some sports site. after i got that e-mail, i posted what you linked to.
three days later, i get the same exact, word-for-word email from the same person. it hurts that i was just a form letter. i want to feel special, you know?
July 13th, 2007 at 1:43 pm
says:thanks for publishing my email. i thougtht we had something special east-vil. you’re just a blog-tease.
July 13th, 2007 at 1:58 pm
says:i link to you, but you don’t have to link to me. i’ll just comment on your website, self-linking to my blog. it’s classier and less desperate.
linking is a lot like signing yearbooks.
July 13th, 2007 at 2:25 pm
says:OK, I would never send an email like that, and I sure as hell don’t live in suburban Omaha, but I am totally guilty of posting stories about how my cat loves to play with balls of twine… or rather, how my cat obsessively licks his belly.
July 13th, 2007 at 2:56 pm
says:Write back and tell them that you’ll only link to them if they perform sexual favors for you. That’s what I do.
Actually, I’m lying. The one or two emails like that I’ve gotten have actually been really, really nice.
July 13th, 2007 at 4:25 pm
says:Sexual favors, eh? Should I be surprised that a good portion of his links are men then?
I only link the ones I read on a regular basis, this isn’t fucking facebook.
July 13th, 2007 at 8:09 pm
says:Okay,
1) I NEVER get these kinds of emails, so is something wrong with me?
2) Was that some kind of slam on midwesterners? If so, then in the words of Miss Stephanie Tanner… “How rude!”
3) Yeah, I totally think that can be categorized under the emails you recieve from the son of the exiled king of Namibia requesting your response so that he can send you 500 million dollars. Just ignore it.
July 13th, 2007 at 8:52 pm
says:If you comment a lot, it’s like getting a link on this blogroll.
July 13th, 2007 at 9:12 pm
says:yeah, i never get emails asking me to blogroll someone either. in fact, i actually get emails from people asking me to remove them from mine.
July 14th, 2007 at 12:06 am
says:fuck you, i bought you a beer.
no, wait, that was todd.
oops.
July 16th, 2007 at 1:17 am
says:- Capt. Mid Gal is correct on all three counts.
- Quin did buy me a beer.
- and I totally sounded like “Oh my God! Is this you? Is this really you, the East Village Idiot? I (read) your blog and I think it’s totally awesome!” the first time I met you. I was also very intoxicated.
July 16th, 2007 at 1:20 am
says:Damn,and I was just going to send you a very desperate email telling you to link to my blog. But Irina is right. Instead I’ll just comment on your blog everyday, self-linking myself.
July 16th, 2007 at 9:42 am
says:I prefer your blogroll to not link to cheesy blogs like that. Stay elite. Keeps out the rif-raf.
July 16th, 2007 at 10:09 am
says:ha
July 16th, 2007 at 2:21 pm
says:This is pretty funny, but I would take it as a compliment. I wish I had people asking to link to me on my blog. I just started it last week though.