Rocket Scientists React to Yankees’ Announcement
May 7, 2007 – 9:19 amThe New York Yankees announced yesterday that The Rocket will be returning to New York and signing a minor-league contract worth $28 million. What do rocket scientists think?
“A rocket for $28 mill? Pfft. Must be a one-stage rocket. That won’t get them very far.”
“Did you hear all that noise in the Bronx yesterday? That was the sound of the combustion of propellant, the escape of exhaust through a nozzle, and the upward thrust of the engine.”
“The fact that the Yankees claimed to ever have The Rocket to begin with just goes to show how pompous the team’s management is. Where’s their launch site? Who was the crew? I don’t buy it.”
“Let’s hope this Rocket is more like Apollo 11 than, say, Apollo 1.”
“I heard The Rocket came from Houston, so it’s gotta be the best in the business… as long as NASA didn’t work on it.”
“Even the most advanced rocket science can’t help solve the Yankees’ bullpen problems.”
“Everyone knows The Rocket belongs in Massachusetts, back where it got its start! You know, where the first liquid-fueled rocket was launched!”
3 Responses
not sure who i hate more - the yanks for blowing this much $ (as they typically do) or clemens for not hanging it up already & pulling this missionary b.s./hired gun crap
just wish piazza had done the appropriate thing way back when…
peace!
By on May 7, 2007
This is probably one of the stupidest things I have heard of late [this meaning paying $28 mil for a once-great pitcher who is WAY PAST HIS PRIME]. Ridiculous.
By on May 7, 2007
My dad grew up in a house right next to the golf course where Goddard launched his rocket.
By on May 8, 2007